This is not a "new" topic... but it seems to be more and more prevalent in our generation than ever. The rise of the "independent-black-woman" and the fall of the "black-relationship". As I pursue more in life (exposure, higher-education, career, etc.) it is only natural that my expectations and standards rise also. In a relationship, I believe that both individuals involved hold the responsibility to challenge each other whether that be mentally, spiritually, emotionally or physically. Today, a strong dependency/laziness has taken the place of the very essence of which stimulates a relationship......work! Challenge itself is work, working to be better, working to progress.
Yes this blog is biased, hell.... I'm a woman. From that perspective I can say that I personally would have rather stayed single than to lower my standards and settle. There are women who just think the solution is to date outside her race (long pause).
It is not where you been but where you are going and if your satisfied with mediocrity, we are just not compatible. Success in relationships are perceived as an intimidating factor rather than a motivating one. With this being said, an "independent-black-woman" has to learn how to balance supporting her leading man while maintaining her own. Now I can put the blame on the Black Woman not properly understanding her role in a relationship to the lack of male presence in her life.... but its a blog not a debate... I will, however, say that the media has played both a significant and detrimental role.
What's a girl to do...?
We can all agree that typical expectations for a Black Man is to be college-educated, financially stable, and well-groomed...... as this was exactly what I wanted. I got it but learned, what I needed derived from a much deeper place with a man than the surface (and pockets). So I leave you with this in mind...
Is our expectations set to high?
Is the Black Man not doing enough?
Is pride the key factor in this issue?
Who's to blame?
What's the solution?